East Aurora Advertiser

Letter to the Editor: Town Republican Committee Mulitculturism Test- Do I Pass?


Dear Editor,

I’d like to be evaluated by the Town of Aurora Republican Committee as a potential candidate for future elections. However, I need a bit more guidance on the “multiculturalism” criteria: Here’s my list so far on how I intend to reject multiculturalism and behave like a true American. I hereby pledge to:

Never buy another Christmas tree. (German tradition)

Never attend the Broadway Market during Easter Week (Polish)

Never attend another 4th of July Fireworks display at Hamlin Park. (Fireworks were invented by the Chinese.)

Throw out my Tchaikovsky CD’s (Russian)

Shred my Black Belt in Tae Kwon Do. (Korean)

Never eat at a local Mexican Restaurant on Cinco de Mayo

Ditto for Chinese, Thai, Japanese, Indian, Italian restaurants & Oktoberfests

Remove all my daughter’s Irish Dance Medals from the house

Never attend another St. Patrick’s Day Parade or sing “Danny Boy” on March 17th

Never listen to Jazz or R&B again. (Too many African and Latino roots)

Never set foot in a Roman Catholic Church because it was imported by Irish and Italians. (Since all Christianity is founded on the God of Israel (Judaism) and the Holy Family was Middle Eastern, I guess all the other Christian churches are off limits too.)

Refuse to sing “Silent Night.” or “Oh Tannenbaum” at next year’s East Aurora Carolcade (Austrian/German)

Never eat another croissant (French)

Come to think of it, Liberty & Democracy have disturbingly French and Greek roots. I don’t know what to do about those.

Do I pass the litmus test?

There’s just one roadblock: I’m the proud mother/grandmother of two incredible, beautiful children of Guatemalan and Afro/Colombian descent. For the first time in eight years we’re beginning to feel unwelcome in this town. Are we?

Susan Russell

East Aurora

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.